Showing posts with label AMA. Show all posts
Showing posts with label AMA. Show all posts

31.12.14

IHAO on ... Everything-Else of the Year 2014

Get ready, this is a long one!

Welp, you guys did it.  You guys took a thing and made it more than mostly ridiculous.  It is a terrible list that is worth no one’s time, and I’m going to give you exactly what you asked for!  It is going to be ridiculous, but honest as best as I can.  The only things I will not be answering from the enormous list of “of the years” will be anything that is not actually an opinion but a fact I can look up.  I’ll also randomize these, and I couldn’t remember who gave me these at all.  So let’s do this.

“Most Wonderful Time” of the year 2014
Christmas is great, as is Halloween, but I can absolutely state that the most wonderful time of the year is early December afternoons, when the sky is grey and the weather is chill, when the breeze is hard and slow.  That is always the most wonderful.  I love it, and always will.

“Meal” of the year 2014
I’ve eaten a lot of meals this year.  On average probably 1.7 a day.  There have been a lot of things made by me and others that have been pretty outstanding, but for me, the meal of this year was a month or so ago at Moe’s.  The health inspector had just come and was giving notes, so I got my Wrong Doug with the grilled green peppers ABSOLUTELY PERFECT.  I have never had one as good as I did that day when Drew and I randomly decided to go early.

“D&D character (in games I’ve run or been a part of this year)” of the year 2014
I am currently running two Dungeons and Dragons games.  I hope to be running a third World of Darkness game soon as well.  Of the two games, to pick a single character would be hard, but I bet you my players would absolutely agree that the character of the year is Livbl, a snake-oil salesman from a chaotic swamp town we spent awhile in.  He was a scam artist, everyone knew it, but they kept letting his charm and work ethic win them over until eventually one of the players bought out every potion this flim-flam artist was selling in one big swoop.

“Seasoning/spice” of the year 2014
Paprika.  From Wal Mart.

“Episode of television” of the year 2014
There are only two television shows I watch at all currently that aren’t wrestling or sentai.  And they both had an AMAZING midseason finale … so I’m going with both of those.  Flash s01e09 and Arrow s03e09.  Both were incredible, and both shows continue to be my favorite shows in recent memory.  Flash is currently a little better than Arrow as a whole, but I love both of these episodes equally.

“Theft” of the year 2014
I was real worried that I wouldn’t have anything for this category, but luckily my good friend Jason helped me out by getting his car window smashed and some stuff stolen.  Don’t worry or feel bad though, he is in surprisingly good spirits about it.  It was a nail-biter, but this one just made it in time.

“Death” of the year 2014
Absolutely it is the devastating loss of the Ultimate Warrior.  You can read about it here, and I quote his final promo in my Wrestling of the Year article as well.

“Day” of the year 2014
May 23rd

“Video Performance by Beyonce” of the year 2014
I am not a Beyonce fan.  That is to say, I don’t listen to her music or watch her videos.  But I am a fan of other artists, and do watch their videos, and one of them happens to be a Beyonce one, which is probably the only video I watched that had anything to do with Beyonce this year, so itwins by default.  

“Betrayal” of the year 2014
Oh goodness.  Ok, so I’ve sat here for probably two hours stuck on this one.  I still have … 34 more of these to answer for the year, and I have quite honestly no idea at all.  I mean, I guess I need to go with … no, you know what, I’ll go a little more subtle than what I was planning.  I’m going with Adrian Neville’s betrayal of his friendship to Sami Zayn as he fought to retain his championship.  Adrian got as close to heel as a face could ever get without actually becoming a full-fledged bad guy, called his best friend unworthy and not good enough, and allowed himself to, while never cheating, bend the rules of matches in a way that is absolutely a betrayal of his own virtues and his friendship and competitive spirit with Sami Zayn.  There we go.

“World Event” of the year 2014
Bah.  Ummm … let’s go with the entire North Korea/The Interview debacle.  That was ridiculous here in the states, but also across the world.  I don’t know if affected anyone else around the world, but it is certainly a crazy event.

“Best Hamming/Worst Hamming” of the year 2014
Worst is easy.  Jim Carrey in Dumb and Dumber To, which as I posted yesterday, was the worst film for me of the year.  He was an awful caricature of himself, constantly chewing the scenary and mugging for the camera.  Best Hamming … The Rock’s social media comedy.  He is ridiculous and fun and hilarious and shout-outs to all sorts of people and is just he smiley-est and dopey-est enormous Hercules of a dude.  Good work, Dwayne.

“Engaged couple (wink wink hint hint nudge nudge please pick Poseph)” of the year 2014
Some of the inside jokes and requests here are a little more subtle.  Like, it isn’t so obvious that Michael Collins asked about “hamming.” But Paige is being pretty daggum obvious.  So I guess I’ll have to pick … Joge!  BOOOM!  That’s right, I’m using a different abbreviation of your names that ends up sounding like a stupid meme that I hate!  Much whatever, stupid joke, don’t do it right.



“Inside joke that no one else will know except the person who was part of it and will confuse everyone cuz im not even gona explain it or give any names” of the year 2014
Potato stockings, bra.  Potato stockings.

“Catchphrase” of the year 2014
S. A. W. F. T.  Saaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwft!



“Dog” of the year 2014
P-chan, my wonderful pug, will always win this award until the unfortunate year she is no longer with us, in which I will retire this category to never be used again.

“Figure of Speech” of the year 2014
It is hard to describe, but a really stupid thing we end up doing in my household is to just mangle and ruin words in the worst possible way.  Such as “Daniel” becomes “Dangus.”  “Drew” becomes “Drewbii.”  “Melanie” becomes “Melalaualulalll.”  It is awful.  And we do it all the time.  So yeah, that.

“Piece of Mail I received” of the year 2014
Uh … I mean, I’ve order a bunch of cool stuff for the site and for myself.  And I know for a fact that the thing I am always the most excited to get is the next One Piece Collection for my DVD set!  I have the first 10, all of which I got this year, and it has become a favorite show of mine! I talked about it on the site in fact RIGHT HERE!  And COLLECTION 11 comes out in January!!!  So yeah, those.  Well, I have to pick one, so I’ll say that the one I was most excited for was Collection 4.

“’Of the Year’ list” of the year 2014
This one.

“Thing I hated” of the year 2014
Man, there are probably a lot of things I fumed and cussed and moaned about this year.  Most of the times it is things on this site, like the Batman review or Interstellar.  But the thing I think I hated most this year was the crop of memes that became popular right at the end of the year, especially the abstract frog feeling thing.  Ugh.

“Kabuki” of the year 2014
Uh … I mean, I watch a LOT of stuff, but … the closest I can say is Ressha Sentai ToQger, I suppose, since it is a Japanese art form like Kabuki.  I love it so much, and other sentai so much, that I’m think about starting a new series about it all.  I’ll talk about it more next year.



“Comedian” of the year 2014
This one is hard.  Wait, no it isn’t.  It is totally gonna be my (soon to be) good friend Paul!  He came and did a ten minute set for the best improve show that myself and the rest of the troupe I am in did, and he performed to his largest audience yet, which is amazingly cool!  He is real funny, and is working hard to be great at comedy.  I need to do something with him next year.  Maybe something … wrestling related.  Maybe something … podcast related.  Hmmm …

“Best class played (in Dungeons and Dragons)” of the year 2014
All right, this one is fun.  In my two campaigns, these are the break downs of the classes:

-          The Books of Eight Campaign: Invoker, Thief, Gypsy, Druid/Thief, Shaman, Fighter, Cleric (deceased)
-          Dunesko: Mirager, Fighter, Cleric/Thief, Necromancer, Bard

There isn’t a lot of overlap, especially considering how drastically different the two fighters are.  But really, my favorite class played currently is Shaman, which doesn’t work like most classes as you cannot cast quickly, you have to plan things out and ask favors of spirits, until you become more powerful and can chance doing an immediate calling.

Oh, wait, it says “best.”  Yeah, I love utility classes, but Shaman is definitely not the best, no offense to Alanthelis “Drew” Turner.  The class I think is the best, as in most effective and as a DM is the one I have the hardest time to plan around, is Druid.  Druid OP, what can I say. 

“Awkward Moment” of the year 2014
I have moments that were awkward for a lot of reasons, but none I really want to talk about or think top out the year.  The most awkard moment I can think of was very early in the year when, during an improve show, I made a “blue” joke.  A very funny one, too, but it was exceedingly off-color, and it bothered a few people, though none of the people that it could have bothered.  Yeah, it was a race joke.  And the guys I talked to of the race loved it.  But it still bothered enough people that I was told about it.  And I then had to go and talk to the parents of the kids I teach improve to every year and apologize.  That was rough.  Luckily, not a single parent cared, thought I did anything bad, or thought I was a bad influence on their kid.  Or at least, not THAT bad.  Ok, so maybe a few, but it didn’t actually hurt my standing with any of the parents or the kids, and that was what I was most worried about.  It was not an easy moment, and absolutely taught me that while I personally believe there is no such things as an “off limits joke,” when I teach kids, I need to make sure I am a little more above reproach if I want to continue to work with those kids, and if I want to move up the ranks in the theatre.

“Confession” of the year 2014
Does this mean I need to confess something?  I mean, I could be scandalous I suppose.  Or is this a thing that was confessed already and should be remembered for it?  Uhh … I’m going to go with the later, because I’ll probably lose at least one friend if I make a confession I was thinking about doing.  Of the confessions that have already happened … OH, a friend confessed to me that he hated it when people use his last name as his name or nickname and I hadn’t known it for YEARS and had not only been doing it, but had gotten other people doing it to.  That was … I mean, that’s a big confession that made me realize I need to be a little better with that kind of thing.  We are better friends now.  :D

“Albino” of the year 2014
This albino pug:



“Game” of the year 2014
Hey!  That’s a real category and not a joke one!  I can totally answer that for reals because I play some games and I like to review things!

The game that epitomized the year 2014 to me was Twitch Plays Pokemon.  It showed a fascinating love of the games, all building up to the newest generation and the newest remake of an old generation.  It got people talking about and playing pokemon again, including me.  Even more, it was a MASSIVE shared experience that created some great story through the random elements of the game because of the way the game worked.  Seriously, check out this write up of the entire story of the game series.  It is fascinating!  

“#swagsockwednesday” of the year 2014
Ok, so looking at the hashtag on tumblr, my favorite one is this one:
And that’s because I bought those for him.  Boom, I’m great.  Go me.

“Protest” of the year 2014
Everything in Ferguson.  Just, all of it.  Cops suck.

“Fruit” of the year 2014
I want to make a joke and put a gay guy, but I’m going to actually answer this correctly.  The fruit of the year here at IHAO has to be … apples, I guess.

“Movie Trailer (for a film I have not yet seen)” of the year 2014
Seventh Son!  That looks like a frickin’ awesome fantasy movie with tons of action and magic and monster and it just looks so cool!  I’m so tired of Tolkien and even more so Peter Jackson styled epic fantasy films, and Seventh Son looks great and new and interesting!  WOOOOO!!

“Cornucopia” of the year 2014
I think my mother-in-law had one she put on her dining room table around Thanksgiving, so I guess that one.

“Character Death” of the year 2014
Absolutely, the one that sticks with me the most this year is from John Wick.  I cannot say who it is, what happens, or any of that, but it was crazy emotional and has stuck with me even to this point.

“Ninja Space Cowboy” of the year 2014
Space Dandy



“Least Noteworthy Performance” of the year 2014
See, this one is hard, because this is quite literally me giving a note to the performance here.  I could cop out now and say I can’t answer it because of that, but nah, I’m going to actually try.  I suppose I’m going to give it to … there was a blonde actress in an episode of Flash that worked with Iris who I think got one line about how Barry would make a good boyfriend or something.  Yeah, her.

“Plot Twist” of the year 2014
The midseason finale to Arrow.

“Choice Make Out Sesh” of the year 2014
May 23rd

“Color” of the year 2014
Interesting … I think I need to go with brown.  Like, shoe-leather brown. 

“Campaign slogan” of the year 2014
“Vote for Me”

“Most unexpected compliment” of the year 2014
My self-opinion is not very pleasant.  And on top of it, I don’t take compliments well.  They make me nervous and anxious and those words are synonyms.  But I got a compliment from a friend that just rekindled our friendship about my skill level and where I could go in the future that really touched me, profoundly.  I may be 30, but I still think of myself as young for whatever reason, mostly because I mean that as a negative, like I don’t have as much worth as other folks.  So it was just incredibly kind, and really shaped my decision on where I wanted to move forward in my life.  So yeah, that one.

“Worst film” of the year 2014
Dumb and Dumber To

“Best non-CGI effect” of the year 2014
This one is a hard one, because I’ve seen a lot of good films this year, but most effects work is now in CGI land.  And the thing that stands out to me is actually from Guardians of the Galaxy … the costuming and makeup for most of the cast.  It was shocking, seeing behind the scenes footage, or how much of the look of this movie was completely legitimate.  Awesome stuff.

And the last and final category of this year …

“Socks” of the year 2014
My wonderful wife got me LootCrate, and I was happy as all heaven to get it!  Even better, it had GROOT SOCkS in there!  The socks are cool, comfortable, and were a hug surprise as well as a present.  Those are the socks that win, absolutely.





All right everyone, thank you for reading my silly inane list of reader suggested categories.  And I want to say to all of you thank you for reading what I’m putting out there.  You guys taking your time to read, share, and comment keep me going and working hard at this, and have really helped me want to push myself further, with better articles, more constant updates, and more features and specials that I can share with everyone.  Thank you all.  I hope you have a great New Year’s Eve, and I will see you all on Monday with the first review of the new year!

1.8.14

IHAO on ... EVERYTHING, TOO

IHAO on EVERYTHING, TOO

Welcome everyone to my second Ask Me Anything!  Why am I doing this?  Because it is entertaining?  Because it is informative?  Because I can do this super early in my schedule so that I can make sure I can see Guardians of the Galaxy and not have to worry about not putting up an article on Friday?  The world may never know, but it is totally that last one.  How does this work?  I spent one month asking people for questions on literally any subject they wanted.  Any joke.  Any idea.  Anything.  Hence the "anything" in Ask Me Anything.  So I've compiled all the questions, randomized them, and now I'm gonna answer them.  Here we go!!


"If an unstoppable force meets an immovable object does the chicken make it across the road unharmed?"
 - Joel Gould

Oh good!  Well, I guess I should establish right now: I will do my darnedest to answer everything as honestly as I can, even if they are absolutely awful and pointless.  So, let's see ... we got a chicken crossing a road, and somewhere in the world, an unstoppable force meets an immovable object.  If I know my physics correctly, nothing would actually happen if that force and that object collided, so I suppose it completely depends on if there is a lot of traffic on the road.  Since the chicken is more than likely in a rural area, there is probably very little traffic.  So yes, the chicken would be perfectly fine. 


"What is the best book I've read?"
 - Drew Turner

Easily Drood, by Dan Simmons.  It is so eloquently written, so enthralling, and such a great story detailing the last five years of Charles Dickens' life.  Easily the best book I've read.

And I now realize that the wording of this is what is the best book that Drew has read.  I'm going to have to take a wild guess of the required high school reading list and go with ... Fahrenheit 451.


"Favorite shoe?"
- Drew Turner


Honestly, I don't think I've found a favorite shoe yet.  If I had to choose from the shoes I've ever owned ... ok, so this story is a little weird but completely true.  At a music camp I went to every year during middle school and high school, one year I wound up with someone else's adidas.  They were gross and nasty and very much not mine.  But somehow they ended up with me.  I threw them into the washing machine and washed them, dried them, and then I had them.  They were comfortable and pretty awesome.  I even got bored in Algebra II one day and highlighted all the white-ish parts with orange and lime green.  They were pretty ballin', absolutely terribly gross shoes. 


"Why CAN'T Mick Jagger get no satisfaction?"
- Kevin McInturff

You see, the funny thing about this song is that everyone misinterprets it.  Using correct grammar, Jagger is saying that he does indeed get satisfaction.  His protests are merely a humble brag.  And he has satisfaction because he is very rich and very famous.


"Who shot first?"
- Drew Turner

The earliest gun seems to be a Chinese weapon called the fire lance, which was a hollow metal spear, filled with gunpowder and shrapnel, and then lit on fire.  So I suppose I should try to figure out the most used 9th century Chinese name: Zhang Li seems most likely.


"Where is the crow road?"
 - Michael Collins


I have absolutely no idea what that means.  Ahh, it seems that it is a scottish novel and television series.  So I'm going to guess it is on your bookshelf, my Scottish reader and chum.  :)


"If you were an exotic dancer, what would your stage name or entrance music be? (Or both, if you have both)
- Nicole Clockel


I think I would like to be called Tons of Fun, and I would use the "Somebody Call My Momma" entrance music that the Funkasaurus used in the WWE!



"You have two sites about the American Medical Association...?"
- Tony Daniel


I do not have any sites about the American Medical Association.  I do run this site here, which is filled with my opinions on all forms of entertainment!


"What is the most annoying song ever produced?"
- Kevin McInturff


Easily everything created by LMFAO.  Worst thing to happen to music.  Ugh.


"Who wins in a headbut?"
-Drew Turner 


Whoever is on offense, unless the person on defense is made of metal.


"Wars or Trek?"
- Kevin McInturff


Unfortunately, I don't really love either.  They are both fine franchises.  I'm going to go with Star Wars merely because I like more of the characters and prefer the genre.  


"If a tree falls down in a forest and hits a mime, does anyone care?
- Joel Gould
"If a tree falls in the forest, does anybody really know what time it is? Does anybody really care?"
- Kevin McInturff


Two of these, huh?  Ok, well let's do this.  If the tree hit a mime, I'm sure if that mime had friends or family, they would care.  Unless he was just a terrible person, but even then, more than likely at least one person cared.  And many people in the world know what time it is.  There are even some who have a job to know what time it is completely, like with an atomic clock.  So yeah, some people know.  And I suspect that they care about what time it is, but more than likely not about the tree.


"Don't the lyrics to Haddaway's one hit wonder 'What Is Love' suggest a man who needed to get away from a harmful relationship, yet it was promoted as romantic?"
 - Michael Collins


That is a very astute interpretation of the lyrics, and definitely what I believe is the intended meaning.  Though, I do have to argue that it is not promoted as romantic, but as a dance beat, as a frenetic and energetic release of emotion, which is exactly what the lyrics are implying.  ALSO, Haddaway did have a second hit, "Life," though it was not as big of a hit in America.  ALSO ALSO I would implore you to listen to an under-appreciated Haddaway song "Please Don't Go" which actually touches on similar subject matter as "What Is Love."  I'm a Haddaway fan.  :D


"In the Star Wars universe, how is it possible that multiple planets exist that have only 1 climate throughout the entire planet?"
- Drew Turner


Star Wars is a pulp fantasy universe.  Much like places in Lord of the Rings are all easily describable as "the place with the spiders" or "the enormous city" or "the hobbit town" or "the bad guy place," Star Wars also simplifies everything, but can more easily make them feel separated by having them be whole planets.  While not to terribly believable on a logic scale, it is a storytelling logic that works perfectly fine.


"What was the worst race ever introduced to a D&D edition?"
- Kevin McInturff


There have been a lot of editions of Dungeons and Dragons.  And a whole bunch of splatbooks that add even more.  So to narrow this down really is going to come to personal taste.  And that falls for me on 4th Edition Dragonborn.  What are the Dragonborn?  Big ridiculous cartoon dragon-people that were introduced to reflect the "cool" and "edgy" nature to 4th edition DnD to make it feel more like a MMO-RPG.  Not only that, they were the bitter pill we needed to swallow as players to have a race that never existed before, but needed to be treated like they totally always existed you guys in our established settings.  Awful.


"Boxers or briefs."
- Kevin McInturff


I personally wear boxer-briefs.  I have worn boxers in the past, and briefs as well.  I do feel I need to do a lot more chances to try them, and I will come back to this in the future once I have bought new underwear and tried it.


"Who would win in a fight?"
- Joel Gould


It really depends on who fights.  Odds are pretty good that it'll be John Cena, though.


"What is the darndest thing a kid has ever said?"
- Drew Turner


More than likely a curse word.  I'm going to guess the c-word.


"Prince or Michael?"
- Kevin McInturff


I prefer Michael Jackson.


"I want to know if there are any stand alone shorts you recommend.  You've talked about youtube series you like but I wonder if there are any short films you recommend. You know, the kinds they have the Oscar category for."
- Melanie Jessel


Shorts are not an entertainment form I generally care about.  But off the top of my head, there was Paperman which was just phenomenal.  Since you mentioned youtube, I also would be remiss if I didn't mention Dorkman's videos, specifically Turf, a music based little conflict that is just super entertaining.


"What is the difference between a horse....?
- Drew Turner


I love thinking about the Christmas show I directed this joke is from.  There is no answers, as there needs to be a second thing to reference with the horse to create some differences.  But I love the memories.


"What philosophical question will never be answered?"
- Drew Turner


That is an interesting conundrum, but I do believe that every question will eventually be answered, as long as time is infinite.  Every answer leads to more questions, but with infinite time, there will always be time to answer every questions, which will create more questions, so on and so on.


"If you, MC Moore, J.D. Allen, and Drew Turner were to unite to form a tribute band, what band would it be for and what would be the name of your band?
 - Kevin McInturff


Considering our musical talents, it would more than likely be MC on drums, myself on piano, and Drew and Jeff to sing.  So we need a male duo ... let's go with Daft Punk!  We would be hilariously Paft Dunk, and all our songs would be about basketball.



"Do all dogs go to heaven, or only the ones who's owners chose the correct religion?"
- Joel Gould


Unfortunately, I do not believe any animals will be going to any form of heaven, regardless of their owner's religion.


"My apartment's internet service begins tomorrow, and unfortunately it is with Comcast. How long do you it will be until we experience agonizing problems with the notorious company?"
- Nicole Clockel


I have never actually had problems with Comcast.  So I bet you will instead fall in love with its service.


"Halloween 3 - neglected classic or "No Mike Myers thus it sucks"?"
- Michael Collins


Neither, though leaning towards classic.  It is a perfectly fine horror film that is a little silly but ultimately truly horrifying.  Not good enough to be a classic, but I will never ever say something sucked because it LACKED Mike Myers.


"What does the fox say?"
- Kevin McInturff


According to Milo and Otis: "Derp derp doo, derpdy doo!"


"Follow-up question, if the above IS true (and I have no reason to think it isn't), what is the inflation rate of problems?
- Drew Turner


I believe the randomization here has hurt this question's impact.  But since problems don't have a cash value, they will not inflate.


"How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"
- Michael Collins


A quick woodchuck google search leads me to the answer that I did not come up with on my own: 361.9237001 cubic centrimeters of wood per day.


"Who would win a Last Man Standing elimination match between Indiana Jones, the Jaws shark, a Jurrasic Park raptor, and ET the extra-terrestrial?"
- Michael Collins

This is not a match-type that exists, but the rules seem simple enough: if you get knocked down by someone's offense in such a way that they cannot get up on the count of 10, they will be eliminated.  Last man still in the match wins.  Durability helps, but the most important thing will be the ability to stand, which Jaws cannot.  He's first to go.  ET is easily next, as he is child-size and tastes like Reeses Pieces.  If the raptor doesn't get him, Indiana Jones will.  Now, raptor versus Indy is a little more difficult.  But I very much suspect that unless there was some cheating by Nazis, Indiana Jones has it won.



"What is your favorite season of the year and why?"
- Nicole Clockel


Winter.  It is beautiful, with amazingly crisp air, and the most beautiful skies.  Snow is awesome, the beach on winter is wonderful, and it has Christmas.  Winter is the best.


"Also, in America, what is the general view of the Twilight Zone?  Uber-nice cult, barely remembered ... or considered one of the great American tv shows?"
- Michael Collins


Unfortunately, most don't really think about the show.  No one thinks badly of it, and I don't even think it is cult classic.  It is more like a well known gem that everyone knows about but very few have actually seen.


"What is the exact at which more money equals more problems?"
- Drew Turner


Probably @@@@.


"Is this some kind of joke?"
- Joel Gould


Nope, I am answering everything as honestly and completely as I can.


"When will the bass drop?"
- Drew Turner


Most of the time, around the 1 minute mark of the average dubstep song.


"Does or does not the dirt do?"
- Joel Gould


I'm pretty sure dirt does not actually do anything.  It is affected by other things, but it does not actually do.


"What are, in your opinion, the top 5 magic cards that have the least synergy with one another?"
- Daniel Lees


Ok, so they need to be cards that absolutely ruin the other card.  So let's start with Counterspell.  It will ruin all four other cards, easy.  Recoup gives a sorcery flashback, and Counterspell is an instant, so as long as I put no sorcery cards for the other three, then we got no synergy here.  Patrician's Scorn destroys all enchantments, which means I need an enchantment, but it cannot be white so they cannot synergize.  Panglacial Wurm is a big ole Green Wurm that only really does anything good if you can search your library which none of the other cards can.  Oh, oh, and I'll put a land that produces black mana ... let's do Cabal Coffers.  There we go.  5 great cards that cannot synergize.


"Why are we here? More specifically, why am I here?"
- Drew Turner


You aren't.  You are "there" from my perspective.  In fact, no one is "here" except for myself, which means there isn't even a "we."


"If you could remake Labyrinth (not that you would) who would you cast from the recent years?
- Patrick Whitlock


Recast my favorite movie of all time with current actors and workers?!  Totally.  Well, unfortunately the Jim Henson workshop is no longer really working well, so I'm going to have to replace the puppets which sucks, but it what I need to do.  And CGI is getting really good.  I would love for it to be a Michael Bay style "CGI characters in practical sets" as the way it is made.  So let's cast the major characters:
  • Jareth the Goblin King: Neil Patrick Harris
  • Sarah: Shailene Woodley
  • Hoggle: Louis C.K.
  • Ludo: Vin Diesel
  • Sir Didymus: Nathan Fillion

"Vanilla or chocolate?"
- Kevin McInturff


Vanilla.


"Who is the most underrated American comic actor, pre-1990?"
- Michael Collins

Jim Varney.  Always Jim Varney.



"What is your favorite word?  What is your least favorite word?"
- Kevin McInturff

Favorite: "Garbage."  I say that a lot, generally describing things that suck.
Least favorite: "Sure."

"What's the finest dinosaur film you've seen?"
- Michael Collins

Uh, I guess Jurassic Park.  Certainly not Baby: Secret of the Lost Legend.  Dinosaur Island is an awesomely hilarious nanar film.  Land Before Time was never my thing.  We're Back is crazy.  So yeah, Jurassic Park.


"How long to the point of know return?"
- Joel Gould

I suppose it'll be as long as it takes for you to have to go to customer service at some story where you are looking for money back or to make an exchange and you can accurately estimate how much longer you will have to be in the line.


"What kind of questions do you want?"
- Joel Gould

I'll answer anything, as I feel confidently I've shown.


"Have you ever used a sundial before?"
- Nicole Clockel

Yup.  When I went camping and hiking as a boy scout.


"If basically everyone in the universe gets a Lantern power ring, regardless of color, where are ours?"
- Patrick Whitlock

Ummm, the syntax here doesn't make a lot of sense to me.  I guess our rings were stolen by some Orange Lantern jerks before they flew to us.


"Best physical feature (no other paeameters)."
- Drew Turner

I am a big fan of legs, both mine and that of hot women.


"When I'm searching for porn, am I spe-spunking?"
- Drew Turner

Unfortunately, no.  "Spe-" is not a prefix that has any meaning, which means that while we use a language that can accomdate any kind of new word creations, in this instance you would be pre-spunking.


"So Kevin McInturff thinks he is James Lipton now? =)"
- Jason Schmidt

I feel very confidant that Kevin McInturff thinks he is himself, not James Lipton.


"If Andrew Allen Turner is actually a manic pixie dream girl that lurks Jason Schmidt's online dating profile, are Trix really for kids?"
- Kevin McInturff

Trix are not for kids, as adults can also buy and consume them.  The first part does not have any bearing on whom Trix are for.


"Why don't you come to Raj anymore?"
- Artie D. End

I come by every now and again, but really I just don't have time any more.  All the folks I want to talk to are my friends on facebook, and I share my opinions on wrestling with EVERYONE nowadays whenever there's a PPV or I feel like fantasy booking or some other wrestling related thing.  I don't have time to do Fantasy WWE any longer and the next e-fed I will do will be a little different than anything I can do on Rajah's forum.  It is nice to know I am missed by some though, considering how much hate I got from most.  :)


"If you were only allowed to play one game for the rest of your life what would it be?"
- Gabriel Taylor

Advanced Dungeons and Dragons, 2nd edition.  It will always be my favorite game.  It'll be sad to leave MtG and a lot of my fabulous board games, but ADnD will always be the game I want to play over everything else if given the option.


"Are you there God? It's me, Margaret."
- Casey Brown

1) I am Jessel, not God.  
2) You are Casey, not Margaret.
3) Yes, God is there, as he is omnipresent, meaning he is everywhere.


"Is this enough questions?"
- Patrick Whitlock

I think I can do one more.


"Only one season into Arrow, why am I so addicted?  Do we finally have a decent DC series show?"
- Patrick Whitlock

ABSOLUTELY!  Arrow is still the best show on television currently for my money.  Season 2 is even better than 1, and Flash is coming to be amazing as well.  The CW shows are made by passionate people who love making these shows, and that translates.  Also, Steve Amell is a straight up super-hero in real life.  Follow him on facebook.  He just does charities for fun, does all his stunts, and is awesome.  Arrow is awesome.  I'm glad you are addicted.



AND THERE WE GO!  Hopefully this was entertaining.  It sure did take me a long time to write!  Enjoy!!  :)

10.3.14

IHAO on ... EVERYTHING

Hey everybody!  I wanted to do an AMA, an Ask Me Anything.  I have an ask thingy over to the right of the screen, I have the facebooks, and I have a tumblr, so I enjoyed getting so many questions!  I am the many of infinite opinions, and here are just a few.  Thanks to everyone that participated.



Shopping Local v. Shopping chain
Jeff Allen

I personally like to shop online.  I like the idea of shopping locally, of supporting the stores that are around that are made by regular folks, but I also enjoy competitive markets and saving money.  So I shop online.  Restaurants are a little different, as I can’t restaurant online.  For that, it is a grab-bag, as you never know if those local places are going to be any good.  But it is always nice to try.


IHAO on ... League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Eric Morris

LXG is a movie that is not good, but has a lot of good in it.  Flemyng’s Hyde is a personal favorite of mine.  The action is silly and fun, the writing atrocious, the characters all interesting, and overall, the movie is harmless and fun, with a lot of flaws but nothing too incredibly stupid.  Grade: C+


What is your least favorite magic card of all time?
Daniel Lees

I play magic quite frequently nowadays, just like I did back in me good ole college days.  The most I was ever involved with Magic was during Ravnica block and Llorwyn block.  I had standard decks in both formats, and just played the most during that time.  And I can tell you straight up what card is my least favorite to play against: Circu, Dimir Lobotomist.  Not only did he mill, my least favorite alternate win condition, but he also shutdown your deck card by card.

Nowadays … I LOVE Circu.  I wanna have a Circu deck RIGHT THIS SECOND.  And I’m going to make one soon.  So I guess that can’t be my least favorite of all time, because I like him now.  So I guess my least favorite magic card of all time is … the handful that got covered with super sugary black coffee when I let a college friend borrow my Kamigawa stuff and he absolutely ruined a whole box of them. 


Is college or life a better teacher?
Jeff Allen

I would say life, except the best teacher of living I ever had was life DURING college.  Not the college classes, but the experience.  So somewhere in the middle of those two, college life is the better teacher.


I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain coming down on a sunny day?
Nicole Clockel

Yes.


What is your favorite movie with an actor you hate in it?
Daniel Lees

My favorite movie with an actor I hate in it.  Ok, so not my favorite movie starring an actor I hate, just the first of my favorites that has an actor I hate within that film.  Ok.  Using handy-dandy Flickchart, one of my favorite websites, I see that it would be Constantine, which has Shia LeBoeuf in it.


What is your favorite DnD character?
Gabriel Taylor

Dungeons and Dragons is a game I will always adore.  And over the past two decades I’ve played and run a LOT of games.  I’ll split this up into three answers, my favorite DnD character (that I played), my favorite DnD character (made by the creators of the game), and my favorite DnD character (that I ran).

My personal favorite DnD character will always be my first good one, Haplo the Charming.  A half-elf bard who was also a spell-maker who got so good at thinking outside the box that my DM cursed the character to never be able to take another level in Bard again.  So he became of a Chronomancer to try to find a way to go back in time and allow himself to continue on his merry way.  He is everything I ever wanted to be: tough, cool under pressure, ingenuitive, sexy, and a hero, even if a fight with a siren left him bathophobia.

My favorite DnD character that was created by the makers of the game ... lots of people love R.A. Salvatore's stuff and Drizzt, the Drow.  But I hate all that.  I do love the Dragonlance series, and those characters (Tanis Half-Elven probably inspiring the half-elf nature of Haplo the Charming).  But I prefer Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman's Death Gate Cycle to Dragonlance.  BUT ... one of their characters did crossover into my favorite setting, Ravenloft ... Lord Soth.  No, he isn't my favorite.  My favorite is his lackey, Azrael, a dwarven were-badger.  He is the first dwarf I ever liked, because he is nothing like Tolkien dwarves: he had no beard, just muttonchops; he was afraid of being deep in the earth; he was greedy not for gems but for power; he was ruthless, and a villain, but one you could relate with.  I love him.

My favorite DnD character that I’ve run a campaign for … man, there have been a lot of great ones.  Piers, the water elementalist.  Elsa, the precognitive enchantress.  Felix Oneshoe, the gnome abjurer that changed all gnomes forever.  All the characters from our college homebrewed world Thoradain, including Rainium the frog-man Warlock!  Coglin, the goblin hunter cursed to become a goblin himself.  Lots and lots of great characters, and with more campaigns in my future still, probably a lot more.  So I’ll say my favorite has yet to arise, just to be on the safe side.


What do you think of dog shows?
Daniel Lees

Dog shows are ridiculous wastes of times ... for other people that don’t affect me in the slightest.


Review the Gravity trailer.
Nicole Clockel

I watched the trailer, and immediately am shocked by the amount of sound and crunching going on in outer space.  Stupid.  Also, I just do not care for Bullock as a leading lady.  And the CGI, terrible.  I hope this movie loses every nomination it is nominated for.

ME FROM THE PAST: It doesn’t.


Another question, what are your thoughts on the whole concept of "The Academy Awards"?
Lenton Lees

Yup, I did sort these to make them more interesting.  Heh.  In theory, the Academy Awards should be really really useful.  And to a certain extent, they are.  But in the long run, they are just a marketing tool that, while entertaining, is ultimately unnecessary, because it is not driven by pure objectivity.


A - Who is the most overrated (1) actor, (2) politician and (3) athlete today ... 
Jeff Allen

Most overrated actor: Leonardo DiCaprio.  He does perfectly fine, but is always Leo.  He never loses himself in his roles, and just isn’t that great.  He does a great job at being Leo in whatever movie he is in, but a superb actor he is not.  A superb Leonardo DiCaprio, he definitely is.

Most overrated politician: Obama.  Not because of anything he’s done, but mostly because of everything people think he CAN do and he totally cannot.  Checks and balances, people.  The president cannot get much done, and thinking he can then getting upset when he doesn’t is dumb.  Stop overrating his status.

Most overrated athleteJohn Szczerbinski.  I do not know why everyone continues to back this guy, but he is never going to end up making it into the upper echelon of athletes.  He comes up short over and over again, making simple mistakes that cost him the match.  Give it a rest, Szczerbinski.


What are the three best reasons for Scrappy Doo?
Kevin McInturff

Scrappy Doo is a polarizing figure of cartoon history.  But here are three best reasons for his existence:
  1.     He saved the ratings on his first introduction, which saved the show and made it have the longevity it currently does
  2.   His existence helped spurn the understanding of the Cousin Oliver trope
  3.    His run on the show not only got toned down after immediately criticism, which enhanced his roles, such as in Scooby Doo and the Reluctant Werewolf (my favorite Scooby Doo anything), but he was also removed from the franchise after only being on air for 8 years, but made the show last an additional 34 years from its looming 1979 cancellation.


and B- who is the most underrated in each of the same categories? [note: actor, politician, and athlete]
Jeff Allen

Most underrated actor: Yesterday I talked about Keanu Reeves very much in this mindset, but I don't think he actually is the most underrated actor.  I easily put it on Jeremy Renner.  That man deserves every accolade, does so well in everything he does, always performs well beyond where he NEEDS to for his script and film.  He works so hard, and was robbed of his Academy Award for Best Actor for Hurt Locker (Grade: A++, btw).  Fans love him, but he is still underrated in the industry.  Hopefully not for too much longer.

Most underrated athlete: I dunno ... Magic Johnson.

Most underrated politician: I dunno ... Magic Johnson.


My Question, If the Main Event of Wrestlemania 30 went on as Batista vs. Randy Orton, how would you book it?
Lenton Lees

Batista v. Randy Orton.  Heel versus Heel.  On the night where the good guys get their win, a night to make new faces, we have a main event that is two heels.  No way around it, we have to add a good guy into the mix somehow.  Personally, my favorite version that I’ve seen is that Daniel Bryan ends up facing HHH in the first match of the show, with the stipulation that if he wins, he is added to the main event.  So you have a grueling match, with Bryan kicking out of the pedigree, and ultimately beating HHH.  Then in the triple threat at the end, you have them fight and fight and fight, but Batista pins Orton to become the new champ, with Daniel Bryan on the sidelines trying to get back in the ring but just not quite making it.  

Then you get Bryan chasing the title all the way to Summerslam, where he one year ago beat John Cena and got screwed out of the title, and this year he finally beats Batista and holds the title high, no chance of getting screwed.

That seems the most likely and best scenario for long plan storytelling. 


Best of SNL lineup.  6 players, at least 2 females and 2 males.
Kevin McInturff

Wow, ok.  This one is incredibly hard.  A lot of the people will have to play double duty, and with only 6 members to make up the whole cast, it is difficult.  Plus, I have to use only cast members from the show, since it is a Best of.  Let’s see.  I’m going to prioritize people who can do multiple styles of comedy, and those who were writers when they were also on-air. 

With a restriction on at least two of each gender, I know I need at least that many.  So for my first two males, I am going to go for one of the best comedians from two different eras, who each brought good things with them.  Let’s go with Bill Hader and Phil Hartman.  I would die to see these two working together, and together they cover quite a bit of range.  For my two women, I’m not going to go as far back, but it will still be two different eras.  Amy Poehler and Cecily Strong.  Poehler did everything on the show except be a writer, and while Cecily is new, she is proving to be a very strong female performer and has taken over the Weekend Update desk.

That leaves me with two cast members left.  I immediately consider Darrell Hammond and Jason Sudeikis, both for being an “every man” impressionist that can cover a LOT of bases.  I’ll think on them for a bit.  Looking through the other women, I don’t actually see any I truly care about being around, with Jane Curtin being the only other female I REALLY think could add something really cool to the group so far.  Sidelined.
Looking at the classics, Bill Murray, Chevy Chase, and Dan Aykroyd pop up immediately.  I really should have at least SOMEONE from the original eras fellas.  I think because of his writing and longevity, I’m going to go with Murray. That leaves me with one slot left.  There are so many great characters to choose from the world of SNL … but you know what, what I really think helped change things and make things better, and would be amazing to see working with the cast so far chosen, would be Andy Samberg for the Digital Shorts.

My line up then looks like, in alphabetical order: Bill Hader, Phil Hartman, Bill Murray, Amy Poehler, Andy Samberg, and Cecily Strong.  I like it.  Hard to narrow down, because I really do miss an acerbic wit like Norm Macdonald, David Spade, or Chevy Chase for the Weekend Update desk, and a man of color would not hurt either, but I feel this is a strong and funny cast, especially with Hartman, Murray, and Samberg as the writer’s team.


What's your opinion on penises as sex organs?  From sex appeal, utility, form factor, etc.  How well do they do their job?  How do they compare to other genitalia?
Drew Turner

The penis I think is formed pretty much perfectly.  It looks great, works exactly as it is supposed to, becomes compact when not in use to make carrying it around easier.  The vast majority of them do their job admirably.  Now, comparing it to the other genitalia is a harder comparison.  I think, in the end, the penis does its job perfectly, but the boobs are the best genitalia.  Because they are great.  Just the absolute best.
.

Three best alternate endings to a major motion picture.
Kevin McInturff

All right.  The first one that immediately pops to mind is Scott Pilgrim Versus the World.  The theatrical ending is that Scott gets Ramona, and that ending is terrible.  Scott learns nothing, he succeeds, certainly, but it is ultimately a pointless pursuit that rings hollow.  The ALTERNATE ending, Scott learns something about himself, and ends up with Knives, in a nicely done and earned finish that has the Scott character becoming much more interesting.  I will never watch the original ending again, this ending is so great.

Second.  Little Shop of Horrors.  I love the musical, love most of the film, and the actual ending, with the good guys all losing and the plants taking over … that’s the way it is supposed to be!  And it is great!  The song is great, the special effects are great, and it is just wonderful … except we do see all our protagonists dead.  In the musical version, all the protagonists come back to sing in the finale, which at least allows the audience to see everyone once more, and to see a company bow.  In a film, if you are dead, you are dead.  Credits.  I get why the ending was altered, but I love the original ending, and the effects were awesome. 

And third, I could go with Clue, because it had a bunch of endings, or Butterfly Effect for choking Ashton Kutcher with his own umbilical cord.  But I’m going with Dodgeball.  Because the alternate ending is just the protagonists losing, the bad guys winning, credits.  It was hilarious, and makes all the Deus Ex Machina jokes they use in the other ending even better.