IHAO on ... Legendary

Oh, WWE Studios.  You just try so hard, and I really do appreciate what you try.  While this isn't the first time I've talked about you, it is the first film I've written about since I restarted I Have an Opinion.  And man oh man, what a movie.

Legendary is a sports/drama/family film about amateur wrestling starring John Cena, Patricia Clarkson, Danny Glover, and some kid.  The general schtick is that Cena plays the kid's estranged brother, and he is trying to get Cena back in his life.  Also, he has a best friend girl who just got boobs (this detail is important to the story) and he is trying to join the wrestling team because his brother did and his dad - who is dead - did.  This causes stress with his mother, Clarkson, who doesn't want to see another of her boys lost to the sport.  Also, Danny Glover is a creepy old dude who fishes at the kid's pond and shows up at his wrestling meets.

This movie is a great definition of melodrama.  It is just people being upset and dramatic at each other all over the place.  Heightened emotions without heightened stakes.  Clarkson treats joining the wrestling team as the biggest mistake the kid could ever make.  Cena thinks that spending any time with the kid will RUIN HIS LIFE!  The kid thinks that joining the wrestling team will fix his entire family of every problem!  And of course, it did.  The movie is cheesy in a non-entertaining way, and is just basically a bunch of scenes of unearned emotion, which makes the truly good emotional scenes that are small feel out of place.

"I don't have to listen to you talk bad about my movie!  Waaahh." - No-Sell Cena

I didn't like the movie.  I also didn't think it was terrible.  It just isn't good.  Those are the worst films to me, things that sit right on the edge of the fence, the average forgettable fare that RedBox makes its real money on and Netflix fills its onDemand with.  But this movie has the unfortunate stigma of RASSLIN, which is unfair.  I love WWE Studios, and watch every film they put out if I can, because I want them to succeed.  I want wrestlers to get SAG cards, to get in an industry that takes care of them.  I want the WWE to make better films, and they are.  It is totally working!  Of course, Legendary was still bad to pave the way for better movies, but they are getting better.  If only this movie entertained me in how bad it was, or how good it was.  But really, I just ended up not liking it and seeing the flaws.

Grade: C-

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