7.3.14

IHAO on ... The Stuff



I love this movie.  Yeah, yeah, I came right out and said the thing that I normally wait for the next paragraph to set up, but I love this movie!  I love how terrible it is.  Because it is TERRIBLE!  Before we get there, let’s talk about what this movie is.

Ok, so some miners find some bubbly snow on the ground and eat it.  It tastes great.  Fast forward an unspecified number of years, and that bubbly snow stuff is now marketed all around the country and called The Stuff, and it is replacing ice cream and yogurt as a healthier, tastier snack.  It is also a Blob alien and turns people into Stuff-Zombies, or Stuffies.  A little kid won’t eat what his family is forcing him to.  An industrial spy, who talks 100% like Huckleberry Hound, is out to prove there is something wrong with the Stuff, and the woman who designed the marketing campaign are all looking for where the stuff originated from to stop it.

The concept is ridiculous and silly, and at a few points, the special effects are just amazing.  Actually, a lot of times the special effects are amazing.  Huckleberry Hound is hilarious.  The commercials for the Stuff within the film are perfect.  So why does this movie get an F?  Oh, spoilers, it gets a big ole fat F.

"Uh, call me 'Moe.'  You know why, uh, they call me Moe?  Because whenever anyone, uh, gives me anything, uh, I always want mo'e."
 - THIS IS A DIRECT QUOTE FROM THE MOVIE!

This movie fails in every ounce of storytelling and editing and cinematography and framing and directing there is.  Not a single scene is edited well, or cut together well.  Things are confusing and poorly shown and jump cut out of nowhere.  There is a sequence where they are in an airplane, and the next shot is of the engine failing, and all of us watching were in hysterics that the plane was going down!  But no, it was just the plane hand ALREADY LANDED and the engine was cooling off.  Ridiculous!  

The music is always out of place.  The acting, even of Huckleberry Hound, is across the board bad.  The film just starts you in "holy crap we are in the middle of a horror movie" mode without every explaining why.  And while I did praise the special effects, any composite shot looks absolutely dreadful. 

This movie reached a mark with me that I’m very happy it did: Best Worst Movie status.  The Room, Birdemic, Troll 2, and now The Stuff.  Watch this movie right now!  You will have an absolutely GREAT time.


Grade: F++

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